Flat Out

One fortunately does not celebrate Christmas.

I got a twinge the last time I was at the computer and by the time I got down the stairs I could barely walk - back trouble.

I am one of those who has had congenital back trouble ever since my early 20.s - and it decided to floor me for the Christmas period, which is possibly a good thing.

It did mean I could not go and get some results from the hospital, and id did mean that when it snowed here in Timisoara to give us a white Christmas I didn't need to go and walk in the damn stuff - so clouds and silver lining what?

I also think it might have contributed to a reduction in the swelling of the hernia (did I mention the hernia - number three on my body is trying to tell me something chart?)

Not that other things are not swollen - grapefruit size scrotal sack making feel like an over endowed ram.

But enough, I must try to keep this thing tasteful.

Too much information ...

I must warn you not to read on if you have a delicate stomach or sensitive nature.

Part of the problem of this tumour thing is the fact that it sticks out like a sore thumb - and that there seem to be associated side effects.

One of the most intriguing is the look - there has been a degree of swelling under the skin and the result is very reminiscent of the nose of a Bull Elephant seal.

The distortion is not discomforting, most of the time (although other swelling does lead to a need for careful walking) .

It does force a degree of readjustment.

The sheer physicality of it and the ability of the body to stretch and swell is becoming a fascination - and one looks down at oneself in the bath with a distance - one inspects and examines as if it were not the self, but an independent body one were looking at.

Not quite all there ...

or too much of a good thing?

There is an extension on my implement of masculinity which has sent several doctors scurrying. Scalpels and anesthesia are now brandished with aplomb.

I tend to move at a more restrained pace. Something to do with the extension.

A triple whammy of heart, hernia and tumor have certainly coloured the festive season with regards to your humble servant - although I have to admit to a sharpening of my wit.

The difficulty is in breaking the news to others - I couldn't give a damn (Quite frankly, my dear) and see in it an inevitable - of family genetics, if not of mortality itself.

I hope to keep posting - although it is very difficult to get to the computer - and I am off to the UK for the cruelest cut of all (I am most likely going to earn my qualifications for working in the Imperial Chinese Bureaucracy - or supervising the Harem of some over cautious Pasha) so sporadic, barren posts only in the near future.